(转帖)黄秋生:现在大陆除了政治,所有都是自由的

在香港,这种事绝对不可能发生

人物周刊:《精武风云·陈真》新闻发布会上,光线传媒的总裁仔细算着你们这些主演所能带来的票房,你听着什么感觉?

黄秋生:演员就是商品。这是一个多重身份的年代,有可能你是艺术家,也是一个商人,也是一个商品。这是资本主义社会把人异化的现象。

人物周刊:你戴过票房毒药的帽子吗?

黄秋生:没有。票房毒药这个帽子是有名的人才可以戴的,比如说你应该票房很好,可是你每一部票房都不好,就有人说你是票房毒药。我们这种以前 根本都不起眼的演员,你连当票房毒药的资格都没有。通常我当主角的戏都是比较艺术性的,票房不好是正常的。《精武风云·陈真》,我不是主角,所以票房好不 好我都不会成为毒药。在巴西拍的《荡寇》,我是主角,可是票房好不好,没有关系呀,因为这个定位是一个艺术片。

人物周刊:艺术片就不用考虑票房吗?

黄秋生:因为没人看啊,没人看就没人注意,没人注意就没人批评,就没事了。

人物周刊:有人说,你用貌似不吝的说话方式掩饰你的不善交际。

黄秋生:我真的是不善交际。演员不是一个PR(public relations)。我是演员,我不是公关,我不善交际是正常的。有太多的演员是公关不是演员,公关做得很好,当演员的时候做得很烂。我拒绝,是因为我 根本没有这个能力。有些时候我知道需要公关,有些时候我愿意,可是我没有这个能力。

人物周刊:这导致你说话很坦白,也就是媒体常说的炮轰?

黄秋生:坦白是你这个人的个性,炮轰是你对这个事情有不同的理解。比如我叫服务员,“这个桌子很脏,你帮我抹干净”。是真的很脏啊,你可以看 见的啊,我叫他清洁一下就是炮轰啊?顶多算是放一个鞭炮吧。

人物周刊:你公开表达对电视剧《杨贵妃秘史》台词的不满,没有考虑过可能带来的影响吗?

黄秋生:每一个人对历史、对剧本、对人物的理解都不同,我当然有自己的理解,可是一个演员到最后必需根据编剧、导演对剧本的理解去创作。我可 以根据你的要求去做,如果你不需要、不喜欢我去设计的话,我就会变成一个装修工。你是要一个设计师,还是要一个装修工?“李白来了一次,你就诗(湿)了三 遍”,我说这种对白跟任何一个正常女性说,都会让人家脸红的吧,都会令她觉得尴尬吧,我还以为他们会把它剪掉,可是已经播出了。“诗”(湿)同音的烂笑 话,还不止一次,玩了大概有4场戏。有一次我在拍戏的时候,都受不了了,石小群的台词是:“跟她玩湿的还是玩干的?”我说:“干的也好玩吗?!”他说: “你说什么?”这个对白剧本里没有。我当时有点生气了。这是在电视上播的剧,在香港,这种事情是绝对不可能发生的。所以我说现在大陆除了政治,所有都是自 由的。

人物周刊:拍之前,读剧本的时候你没看到这些吗?

黄秋生:这部戏刚开工导演就开了一个会,讲了两个小时, “这个剧本非常好,编剧花了3年时间写的,对白里的每一个字都不能改。”我就问导演,“一字不能改啊?”导演说,“朝廷上的对白不能改,平常的可以改。” 我自己的我会改,用我自己的方法改,可是人家的对白,我怎么在现场叫他去改?我不能跟导演说你叫他改一下吧?我不能教人家演戏吧?

这件事以后,我再拿到剧本会完整地看完,然后在合约里写明:我有权利改剧本,改我自己的对白。但是百分之多少你可以改?这还是个问题。

风流和下流的界限在哪里?有些人觉得这是风流,我说这是下流。

人物周刊:我查过“炮轰”的意思,指对事件或者个人进行语言攻击,原先用于战争。

黄秋生:我这个不叫炮轰,这是表达我自己对这件事的看法和感觉。现在的人词汇太贫血,什么事情都把它形容为炮轰,哗众取宠!不说你炮轰谁看? 恨不得说你要杀人,把你形容为一个野兽、魔鬼才好。

我年轻时的状态还可以说是炮轰,因为比较激烈,比较激动,比较用力,我现在都没气力去炮轰了,我讲的只是一个事实,有证据的事实,没有证据的 我都不讲。比如《杨贵妃秘史》这部戏,所有的剧本我都留下来了,所以千万不要再说我是乱讲。

人物周刊:你表达了这种不满后,碰到过导演尤小刚吗?

黄秋生:我是对事不对人,我针对的不是他啊。后来去宣传时也碰到他啊,他对我很好,很有礼貌。剧组里面有很多事情都很开心的,为什么不讲开心 的事情呢?为什么总讲负面的事情呢?

人物周刊:香港媒体和演艺圈一直是对抗的关系吗?

黄秋生:在他们眼里我们这一行的人都是做“鸡”、做“鸭”的,全部都是黑社会,都是抛妻弃子的,所有人都是坏人。挖,挖到了就把那个点扩大。 我认为香港没有媒体,所有的杂志都是色情狂的杂志,买来看一下你就知道,你低胸他就拍你胸部,女的穿裙子他就趴在地上拍,那不是有牌的偷窥狂吗?把所有的 这些上封面。他们的视点全部都是你离婚啊,没钱了就说你精神病啊。香港媒体是病态的,他们的心态是扭曲的,我觉得应该介绍一个好的心理医生给他们。

人物周刊:你发现狗仔队偷拍怎么办?

黄秋生:打跑,打到他们怕,告到他们怕。

内地剧组为什么这么乱?

人物周刊:拍了这么多年戏,你待过的哪个剧组最专业?

黄秋生:我刚才还在和他们(助手)讲,哪有那么专业的剧组啊。刚才在刘伟强的剧组,他在休息的时候,大家研究说这个西瓜要不要开,刘伟强突然 间大声说,开。门口工作人员立刻往这边看,以为怎么了。你知道其他剧组会怎么样吗?对不起啊,我要讲一些比较极端的例子:这边在喊,(突然很大声地)我× 你妈……那边就更大声地喊,我×你祖宗……其他人在做什么?没反应!没有任何人对这种激烈的语言有任何反应。这就是其他的剧组。刘伟强的剧组只要有一个人 声音比较大,就会很突兀,因为你在拍摄现场发飚,肯定是有一些工作上的严重的事情,你才会这样喊出来。在其他剧组你就会看到很多的神经病。所有人都在喊, 所有人骂所有人。

人物周刊:在这样的场景中,你是什么状态?

黄秋生:我是个旁观者,坐那儿抽烟,看,分析,为什么会这么乱?我看到的就是一个神经病院。你说它是中国特色吗?你说这样可以专业吗?你说这 样拍摄的时候可以比较顺利,比较省时间吗?不可能的事情。

人物周刊:内地剧组会不会好一些?

黄秋生:我讲的就是内地的。香港以前是这样的,现在已经没人这样了。本来内地剧组是很规矩、很专业的。姜文那边就很专业,没有人这样,因为他 们受的训练是俄罗斯的那种,是正统的。现在内地的剧组我估计都是香港人过来教坏的。香港以前过来的导演都是亚洲电视、无线的那些人,他们过来的时候就是大 哥,会在现场讲很多脏话,用广东话骂人,骂完之后,他们散了,可他们训练出了下一代,下一代长大之后继续骂,已经骂到没反应了,皮都厚了。你还是一个文艺 工作者吗?别人问你是做什么的,“我×你妈,我是做文艺工作的,我是艺术家!”这简直就是荒谬的事情。

香港演艺界最敢说话的人

人物周刊:据说在香港演艺界,你和吴镇宇是最敢说话的人。

黄秋生:我比他更敢。有不满,这个不满是大家的,不是你自己的不满。比如说我喜欢喝茶,可是现场只有咖啡,我非常不满,这个跟大众的利益无 关,是你自己的事情,你就不应该讲出来。可是我要求的只是对白写得好一点,为什么那么下流的对白会不停地出现呢?我要求拍摄现场的环境健康、卫生,有问题 是应该讲出来的,不讲出来怎么解决呢?我进棚第一天,发现身上很痒,还以为自己过敏呢。第二天还是那么痒,我就问其他人,有东西咬吗?“有啊,有跳蚤。” 我问他们有没有喷杀虫水、有没有消毒,说没有。我让工作人员晚上我们收工后喷杀虫水,第二天发现没事了,那就证明我说对了。我会搞清楚,这个是不是我自己 的问题,证明了这个不是我自己的问题,我就要解决。如果是老鼠身上的跳蚤,会传染瘟疫的。为什么要求这个?我们不是乞丐呀,我们是演员,商业上你是明星, 再高一点,你是搞艺术的。没有人会喜欢看一个三天不洗澡、乱七八糟的人去演戏的。

网上有人说我演的唐明皇牙齿黄,说我抽烟太多。我不是抽烟太多,是喝红酒太多。进剧组差不多两个月,我照镜子看自己都觉得没事,挺好。一是每 天还没见到阳光就进棚,天黑了才回房间,二是我住的那个地方光线不够。为什么每次我去剧组都要看房间的光线?因为我老了,眼睛老花,不够光的话,我看不清 楚。有一天在窗子前照镜子一看,哇,像死尸一样。

我可以说网上说我的人是挑事吗?我可以说他们是炮轰吗?人家提出意见是有原因的,是真实的,是为你好。你自己要注意,因为我们是明星,我们要 卖钱。我应该感谢他们提出来,知道问题,就可以改善了,你才可以进步啊。多少年前鲁迅已经写了——你说我脸上有毒疮?我自己看不见,我还以为我的毒疮很美 呢。《华盖集》里面写的,大家再去看一次鲁迅。

人物周刊:一直这么坦率,生存不艰难吗?

黄秋生:当然有人告诉我这样很艰难,很辛苦,不过我也不觉得他们(不坦率的人)很容易呀。我艰难,可是我开心;你也艰难,你看你多不开心啊。 这个就是我们的区别呀。我从来没有跪下来求人,我如果妥协,也是战略性退却,为了下一次进攻,为了更好地再一次出发。两万五千里长征就是这样啊,为了保留 实力,毛泽东的思想、战略好厉害。我妈喜欢背诗词,喜欢中国古典文化,我从小就受她影响。小学五年级的时候请了一个补习老师,马老师,他是香港大学读政治 的,左派,我到他家看到很多历史、哲学类的书,包括马克思、毛泽东,我在一边做功课,他就在一边纸上写毛泽东诗词,我经常偷着把他写的东西收起来回去读。 我喜欢毛泽东的诗词,大气磅礴。在我眼里,他不只是一个政治家,还是一个优秀的诗人。

五戒全犯,犯了之后就忏悔

人物周刊:有人说你有霸气,与你合作很麻烦。

黄秋生:我的个性跟一般人不一样,大多数人都是“有话就别讲,省得麻烦,别挑事,别逞英雄”。可是我们小的时候,学校里教我们学岳飞呀、史可 法啊,长大后到了社会上,又要我们“把以前那些都忘了吧。你需要知道这些,崇拜这些人,但你不要做这种人。你要当英雄啊?千万不要”。那我为什么受教育 呀?只是知道几个概念,几个人物,几个年份就算了?浪费时间。

人物周刊:你的性格与演艺圈格格不入?

黄秋生:我也不需要入。我好像一直都没入过。有些时候,想入一下,可是入不了。比方说你不是同性恋,然后你身边一大堆同性恋,你想尝试一下自 己是不是同性恋,那根本不可能,因为你没有输入这个软件。

人物周刊:你最看不惯这个圈子里的什么态度?

黄秋生:没有立场,和稀泥的态度。

人物周刊:“香港最毒的嘴”这个称谓是你有立场的一种表现吗?

黄秋生:最毒的嘴呀,我是其中一个,还有人更毒呢。你有一张很毒的嘴,也需要一些很毒的思想才可以,没有思想配合,只是嘴毒,没有意义。我觉 得最毒的不是我的嘴,是我的思想。嘴巴只是一个工具。

人物周刊:通常认为,笃信佛教的人性情温和。

黄秋生:我个性鲜明。《水浒传》里面,鲁智深打烂那两个叫金刚,怒目金刚抓小鬼,我就是专门抓鬼的。香港一个画家画的一张“此君能抓鬼,名字 叫钟馗”,我非常喜欢。我还经常打妄语。妄语不单是说谎,吹牛、乱讲话、讲色情笑话都是妄语,所以我经常打妄语,五戒全犯,犯了之后就忏悔,忏悔之后又 犯,简直就是一个俗物。唉,真要彻底戒了就成佛了。

人民艺术家才是最高境界

人物周刊:1993年,《八仙饭店之人肉叉烧包》中的变态杀手为你赢得了第一个影帝——第13届香港电影金像奖最佳男主角。可那次拿奖,你似 乎并没有太多喜悦。

黄秋生:拿奖之后有人恭喜,当时可能是我非常自卑,没有感受到那种真诚的、热烈的感觉,好像中间隔了一层纱,看所有的事情都好像不是真的。在 酒店举行庆功宴做访问,做完访问很晚了,回头一看,东西都收了,人都走了,没有人留下来跟你庆祝。没有吃饭,又冷,又饿,旁边一个人都没有。半夜12点多 在尖沙咀,走出酒店,风在吹,“唉?我去哪儿?我今天发生什么事情了?”好像是做了一个梦。一个人饿着肚子拿着奖杯走在街头,就好像拿着一瓶酒,也没有人 看你,好像鬼魂一样。

不像现在,谁拿了奖,访问后都有一个PARTY,一堆朋友,你认识的、不认识的都在等你。我那个时候真的一个朋友都没有。一个人,我没吃饭, 你可以想象吗——那种孤独,荒谬。我只有打电话给邱礼涛,然后两个人在一个小酒吧里喝啤酒。

人物周刊:那时大家怎么看你?

黄秋生:我怎么知道人家怎么看我,我连朋友都没有。后来有些人告诉我说,“那个时候,我觉得你很讨厌,脏话多,又很容易发脾气,又没有人缘。 现在好多了,讲话又好笑。”可能我现在讲的废话多了。

人物周刊:你害怕衰老吗?

黄秋生:你不能怕它,这是一个阶段啊。我觉得我怕年轻比怕老多。

人物周刊:因为你年轻时一无所有?

黄秋生:年轻的时候一无所有,什么都不知道,得罪人,前路茫茫,什么都不稳定,也不满意。现在我比较容易把控周围的事情,我现在过得蛮好的。 年轻惟一的好处就是比较容易认识女孩子,年轻有精力嘛,可以跟女孩子去吃饭,吃完饭去喝酒,喝完酒玩到天亮,再开车去山上看日出。不会谈了好半天,最后变 成——“今天我们去吃饭吧。”“好啊,叔叔,我能约我男朋友一起来吗?”(笑)

人物周刊:1998年,因为《野兽刑警》,你第二次得了金像奖影帝,那时你好像病着?

黄秋生: 1997、98、99年得了甲亢,演《野兽刑警》时已经好了一点了,可还是很胖,全身都肿。特别是97年,病得很重,肿得跟猪头一样,有一阵没有工作,就 去了伦敦学戏剧。每天想的就是学英语,上学,买东西回家煮饭,睡觉。早上起来听听教堂的钟声。躺在浴缸里面,点个蜡烛。英国的房子很暗、很黑。

人物周刊:没有危机感吗?

黄秋生:我就是因为担忧太多,所以才有这个病的。伦敦之行思想、见识都改变很大,整个人的性格都改了,变得让自己比较舒坦。

人物周刊:有人帮你算过,迄今为止,你得过6个影帝,但你经常说奖杯无用。

黄秋生:当你没有的时候就有用,你需要鼓励的时候就有用。到现在我自己都可以鼓励自己的时候,奖杯有没有都没所谓。有一天,我可以拿到一个人 民艺术家的奖杯,那就有用了。(笑)人民艺术家不是一个奖那么简单,一定要有经典作品,比如说赵丹、于是之,他们有很伟大的作品。姜文是一个艺术家,可是 我觉得还没到人民艺术家的境界。

人物周刊:你觉得自己是艺术家吗?

黄秋生:我现在还不是,我要开始做了,朝着这个方向努力——对人有贡献的艺术家。之前我觉得演戏只是我的工作、职业,现在是开始实现我的事业的时 候。我要实现我对艺术的追求,实现我自己的创作理念。我希望我的作品,除了带给人娱乐之外,还有很多思想性的影响,这样才是一个艺术家。或者我的创作里面 有新的、经典的风格,比如说我现在创作一种新的演戏概念,这个概念影响整整一代,那就厉害了。

骗子才去玩抽象

人物周刊:你觉得演戏是有意义的事吗?

黄秋生:有,非常有意义。这个问题我想了好久,可以肯定告诉你,有。我们卖的是梦,人需要的就是梦。我们人类所有的文明都是建立在梦上面的, 所以我们这个行业是非常重要的。

人物周刊:你怎么看有些导演边做梦边说教?

黄秋生:说教的导演没人看,不会说教的导演肤浅。我在伦敦学习的时候,老师就告诉我们,不要经常说教,偶尔说一两句就对了。你一开始就说尼 采、黑格尔,谁要听啊大哥?都睡着了。先讲一个好听的故事,里面偶尔有一两句说教,回过头来接着讲故事,这就对了。

人物周刊:你曾说,一直在跟自己抗争,现在呢?

黄秋生:还在抗争,减肥呀。我喜欢吃,太喜欢吃了,我要抗争到底。我是很懒惰的一个人,我要和我的惰性抗争。我要继续努力,把我的艺术呈现出 来,我要把所有我得到的回馈给社会。很伟大吧。(笑)有很多人40岁开始中年危机;50,累了,退休了;60,快死了。我高兴的就是我找到了目标。之前我 就是要赚钱,要拿奖,要读书,我要学很多很多。现在我是要把我知道、我得到的力量回馈给社会。要快快快,没有时间了。

人物周刊:哪部戏是你的代表作?

黄秋生:我的代表作在舞台上。1986年我在演艺学院上学时演过一部《大鼻子情圣》(根据法国戏剧家埃德蒙·罗斯丹的名剧《西哈诺·德·贝热 拉克》改编),这部戏的制作费是20万,当时社会上的反响说学生不应该有那么多的制作费,浪费。公演获得很大的成功,法国文化协会写信到学校表扬,特别是 黄秋生。当时很多专业演员(现在是好朋友了)很感动,跑到后台抱着我哭,“我现在知道什么叫演戏了。”演完之后,当初骂学院说浪费的评论家又说“值”。这 种演出让整个学校被社会接受,那部戏直到现在,在学校里面还被作为教材用。演艺学院上学那3年,几乎每一个大戏都是我主演,连续3年都是最佳男主角,奖项 一大堆。

5年前,我排了一部英国的戏,《家庭作业》。有一次,我演得很好,那些影评人、剧评人来看,居然没有反应,我出来谢幕的时候,看着他们,心里 想,“哼,你们算是观众?”冷笑后转头就走。来看戏你们在分析,分析这个戏怎么样怎么样,我感受得到他们那种讨厌的态度。你喜欢就鼓掌,演员要的就是一个 掌声,要的就是一个鼓励,你们明明知道是好的,为什么要这样反应?演戏是要打动你的心,你把心都关起来,它怎么打动你啊?你在那儿分析个屁呀,最重要的是 把心打开。

人物周刊:林奕华在内地很有市场,你看过他的话剧吗?

黄秋生:我在演艺学院上学的时候就跟他开骂了。有一次他在舞蹈学院搞了一个小小的表演研讨会,我去看,几个学院,分别有人表演芭蕾舞、中国 舞、现代舞,轮到他的剧团表演时,几个小朋友出来放些音乐随便跳了跳,跳完之后大家研讨。我就发问,“你这个是艺术啊?”他说,“每个人都有权利去表演他 自己的艺术。”我说,“你这样的艺术我看不见技巧啊。收我20块,我为什么要来看你这样跳?我为什么不回家照着镜子自己乱跳?你这样是艺术吗?表演什么东 西给我看?我明天发明一个石头舞(做石头状,扭动几下),这样可以吗?”他说,“可以呀。”“那我没有问题了。”第二天他在报纸上写了一大段理论,讲了德 国舞蹈家皮娜·鲍什,我看完之后心想,“真是神经病啊,你把自己跟皮娜·鲍什相提并论啊?她怎么样,你就可以怎么样?我看过皮娜·鲍什的表演,她舞台的设 计美不胜收啊。你那是什么表演啊?你把自己当作皮娜·鲍什,我当我自己是莎士比亚,简直就是艺术界的无耻之徒。”我那时是这样想的,我现在跟他没有什么关 系,现在人家搞了那么多的戏我没看,没有资格评论,没有调查就没有发言权。

有些所谓的艺术家搞的就是这些,把你闷死。你看不懂?你看不懂就是你水平不够,你看不懂我就是艺术家。最容易的骗子就是玩抽象。其实他是一个 生意人,他是包装艺术家。内地很多人都是要充艺术家,充懂艺术。你看很多土包子喝红酒时加糖、加雪碧,这样他们还要告诉人家我喝的是红酒,我抽的是雪茄, 我看的是英语杂志——倒过来看的。一堆这样的人。

从小就有挫败感

人物周刊:你什么时候有过挫败感?

黄秋生:我一直以来就有,从小就有很多挫败感。我真的可以说我的整个成长过程就是一部奋斗史,包括我的人格,包括我的命运,我是怎样从一个小 学毕业生变成现在演艺学院院士的。从小我妈就希望我读书,但我小学毕业后一直在工作,直到进了香港演艺学院才真正读书。真是想不到,最后我会成为院士。

人物周刊:经济状况最差的时候什么样?

黄秋生:哇,穷得不得了啊。我妈有肺病,我连住的地方都没有,后来她再结婚就是为了养我。我那时候没学历,不知道自己要什么,又反叛。虽然爱 看书,知道的东西比同年纪十几岁的人多,可不等于说我学历比他们高,他们中学毕业后可以找一份很普通的工作,我中学都没毕业,找不到工作。23岁去了演艺 学院,那几年是最好的了,我一直逼自己,因为我爱这个行业,这个工作,学校老师都讲英语,一定要不停地学,其他同学学历都很高,我一定要跟人家去比较, 追,一直在追。

人物周刊:童年时的恶梦或者阴影还有哪些在影响你?

黄秋生:没有了,真的没有了,连做梦我妈死都很少了。以前经常做的恶梦——裸体回不去家、母亲死了、挨打后打不回去,都没有了,现在通常在梦 里会把人打死。

人物周刊:你把当年拍三级片的经历称为心理治疗,现在如果有一部戏需要这种……

黄秋生:(打断)唉,做不了了我,我现在在他(经纪人)面前换裤子都不舒服。其实我从小的个性就很害羞,天生的。小时候放我在凳子上面,把我 的鞋子拿走,我绝不会光着脚踩在地上去拿鞋,觉得脏。后来因为家庭穷,读寄读学校,什么垃圾也放嘴巴里面,什么乱七八糟环境也睡,不洗澡,这些都是后天培 养的。我在家里换衣服要背着我老婆的。

人物周刊:完成这种心理治疗后,你又拍过裸戏吗?

黄秋生:有过,还拍过王晶的那些戏,后来我告诉他我不裸了,让女孩子裸吧,反正你们都要看女孩子,谁要看一个大肥佬裸体呀?

我喜欢战士,我有英雄情结

人物周刊:你在《太阳照常升起》里演一个解放后从南洋回国的老师,对自己的表演满意吗?

黄秋生:那时刚解放,很多留学生从南洋、美国、香港回到大陆,姜文有当时的照片,我看了之后都吓了一跳,原来那么洋化,那么开放,那么好。我 觉得我自己演得很好。

人物周刊:姜文很了解你吗?

黄秋生:我也不清楚,反正就是有点感觉,大家有某种东西很接近。他的风格,他的视野,我比较欣赏,比较理解。他不需要了解我,他了解他自己就 了解我了。我还非常喜欢鲁迅,他对我影响很大。

人物周刊:你所欣赏的人——毛泽东、鲁迅、姜文,身上都有战士的特质。

黄秋生:对,我喜欢战士。我喜欢的历史人物也是战士,我还喜欢亚历山大、成吉思汗、贝多芬。崇拜英雄,有英雄情结。

人物周刊:你说姜文是中国惟一保持自己状态的艺术家。

黄秋生:他真的是。最近他拍的《让子弹飞》我没看,可能又不一样了。穷久了,就拍一个商业的,真的没所谓。后面你再拍你自己的电影,走你自己 的路。

人物周刊:你对好莱坞大片怎么看呢?

黄秋生:什么大片!大烂片!都是垃圾!

人物周刊:如果他们来找你,你会接受吗?

黄秋生:有钱就拍啊。我拍那个《木乃伊3》,制作很大啊,出来变得很烂。

人物周刊:你对奥斯卡向往吗?

黄秋生:奥斯卡没拿过,给我我会要,这是我入行的时候答应我妈的。现在有一个替代品,刚入行的时候去美国旅行,买了一个奥斯卡奖杯模型。等我 拿一个真的回来,就放在旁边,一个大的一个小的。

怎么中国人说我是老外,到了英国,人家又说我不是老外?

人物周刊:你一直说要过自由的人生,怎样才算是你所说的自由的人生?

黄秋生:其实很多时候你不自由是因为你自己的概念把你困在一个不自由的状态。有的时候跟人谈起潜规则的那些女孩子:第一,其实不是她旁边有潜 规则,是她自己认为有潜规则;第二,她也认同这个潜规则;第三,她又进去这个潜规则。这个潜规则不是人家给你的,是你自己给自己的,你自己没有这个潜规 则,这个潜规则就没有。

人物周刊:现在还有什么事情困扰你吗?

黄秋生:困扰我的就是那个不专业的环境,还有在现场人不尊重人,我最看不顺眼的就是这个。如果一个人生活的世界永远就是我自己好就算了的话, 那没什么意思——旁边有强奸我不管,反正不是我老婆;旁边有抢劫我不管,反正不是抢我,到最后就抢你了。用置身事外的态度生活的人,到最后他就会受到伤 害,他是用默认的行为去赞同这种不应该发生的行为。

人物周刊:现在还有自卑感吗?

黄秋生:没有了。以前别人叫我杂种我就打,后来有一个好朋友他也是混血,他说实际上人家说杂种就是一种称呼而已,对你没有什么态度,我就接受 了。后来我爸呀,我的背景啊,我的过去啊,一步一步都过关了。

人物周刊:你的人生一直在过关。

黄秋生:对,我的人生一直在过关。以前会觉得自己没有学问,没有学位,不会英语,每个人都以为我的英语很好,年轻的时候人家跟我讲英语,我脸 红得不得了,一句都不会。慢慢学,会讲了又不敢讲,怕发音不正确,后来在英国的时候过关了。我真的去英国寻根了,“我是谁,怎么中国人说我是老外,到了英 国之后,人家说我不是老外?”我经常问人,“你说我是什么?”人家说,“你也不是中国人,你是哪里来的?”后来就发现,我根本就混血嘛,寻什么?根本都 在。佛教说你的心在哪儿?心在里面嘛,一直都在。这个世界根本没有变,变的是你自己。不是风动,不是幡动,是你心在动。

人物周刊:你喜欢节日吗?

黄秋生:有些人生日喜欢去餐厅,找几个女孩子陪着插蜡烛,我觉得他们很悲惨,没有小孩帮你插,没有亲人帮你插,没有母亲帮你插,要几个不认识 的人陪着插蜡烛,然后给你唱happy birthday to you,你还在笑,非常悲哀。有的时候在餐厅吃饭,会看到旁边又来一个这样的笨蛋。

圣诞节也没什么意义,我看到有人圣诞节就去找女人喝醉,睡大觉。再不就晚上出去男的找女的,女的找男的搞在一起。12点听到外面钟响,人们尖 叫,一年又过去了,生命又少一年了,你们还有什么好兴奋的?

人物周刊:若干年后,你希望人们在提起你时怎么评价?

黄秋生:一个有勇气活过的人。

This entry was posted on 星期六, 09月 11th, 2010 at 6:54 下午 and is filed under 废话. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

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